Mystery

Okay, this post is intended for only one person out there. I cannot say who though. Mostly because I have no idea who it is supposed to be. But I just got back from dinner at my dad's house and decided that before bed I would look through the small pile of mail on my dresser. Nothing too interesting really, except for a plain white envelope with my address typed across the front. It was sent March 14th from San Francisco (which could really just mean from the Bay Area). There was no return address and as I held it up to the light I could see that it was a newspaper clipping. My interest was piqued. A newspaper clipping that is pretty personal. I opened the envelope and confirmed that it is indeed a newspaper clipping from the March 11th Financial News, but who knows which paper. Attached was a yellow post-it saying "Gemma, Thought you'd be interested! -J."
J? Okay maybe the article will give a clue of who J is. But which side to read? It is not immediately obvious. J is either trying to tell me to learn how Mutual Funds work, or J is emphasizing that people should check out a free report so that their retirement fund doesn't go down the drain. Okay, I am missing something. I am no closer to deciding who J might be and now faced with the second problem of deciphering the article. I know nothing of finance. Perhaps J knows this and has decided that it is time I took initiative and dive into the world of finance. I have no clue why anyone would send me this. So I turn to Google, which of course producers the answer.
Confirming my growing suspicions, Google tells me that the clipping and note are a scam. Why is it that mysteries are better solved when on television or in books but only disappointing in real life?
This post is intended for that one person who handwrote my post-it. You just wasted 15 minutes of my bedtime with a mystery that didn't even have a good solution. You also wasted a perfectly good post-it note attempting to scare seniors into looking into a free report to help their retirement fund, but you see, J, I am 20 years old. One day I hope to discover and solve a real mystery with a truly satisfying answer.